You ever have one of those moments where a TV show hits you with a life lesson so good, you sit there staring at the screen like, Damn, I needed that? That’s exactly what happened when I watched Ted Lasso school Rupert in that legendary darts scene.
Now, I don’t know if you’ve seen it (if not, fix that), but this scene isn’t just about darts. It’s about life. It’s about people. And it’s about why the world would be a whole lot better if we stopped assuming we’ve got people figured out and just stayed curious instead.
Set the Scene: Arrogance Meets Aw-Shucks
So, here’s what’s happening. Ted—our mustachioed, biscuit-baking, endlessly optimistic hero—is at a pub with Rebecca. In walks Rupert, Rebecca’s ex-husband, the kind of guy who was probably born wearing a smug expression. He challenges Ted to a game of darts, fully expecting to humiliate him.
And Ted? Ted plays the part perfectly. He acts casual, makes some small talk, throws a few mediocre shots—he lets Rupert believe he’s got the upper hand.
But then, just as the game is about to end, Ted does what Ted does best: he drops a truth bomb so smooth it should be bottled and sold as whiskey.
The Walt Whitman (Maybe) Quote That Changed Everything
Ted starts telling a story. He says he was riding the train one day, minding his business, when he saw a quote graffitied on the wall:
“Be curious, not judgmental.”
Now, I should pause here to say that Walt Whitman never actually said this—but does it really matter? The point is the message, and the message is golden.
Ted goes on to say that his whole life, people underestimated him. They made fun of him, dismissed him, wrote him off as a joke. And why? Because they judged him instead of being curious about him. They assumed they knew everything just by looking at him.
But here’s the thing: if they’d been curious, they would’ve asked him, Hey Ted, do you play darts?
To which he would’ve happily responded:
“Yes. Every Sunday with my dad from ages 10 to 16.”
And then? Bullseye. Game over. Rupert loses.
Why This Hits So Hard
This scene is brilliant because it’s not just about Ted kicking Rupert’s ass in darts (though, let’s be honest, that’s satisfying as hell). It’s about how often we think we know people, when really, we don’t know a damn thing.
How many times do we assume stuff about someone based on their job, their clothes, the way they talk? We do it without even thinking.
- The quiet guy at work? Probably boring.
- The woman who stays home with her kids? Must not be ambitious.
- The guy who cracks dad jokes? Can’t possibly be smart.
We do this all the time. And in doing it, we miss out. We miss out on knowing incredible people, learning unexpected things, and seeing the world in a way we never would’ve otherwise.
But curiosity? Curiosity opens doors. Curiosity means you ask questions, listen, and actually see people for who they are. And when you do that, you realize that nobody is ever just one thing.
Why This Matters (Especially as a Dad)
As a dad, this message hits home. My daughters are still little, but I think about the world they’re growing up in, and if there’s one thing I want to teach them, it’s this.
Be curious. Ask questions. Assume people have stories you don’t know.
And I know, as a parent, I have to practice what I preach. Because let’s be real—I could look at my daughters and say, “You’re toddlers, you don’t understand big ideas yet.” Or, I could be curious. I could ask, What are they thinking about? What little things make their world go round today?
Spoiler: For Diana it’s usually COOKIES. But still.
Curiosity makes relationships stronger. It makes businesses run better. (Seriously, ever tried "helping" someone without actually listening to them? It’s a disaster.) It makes life richer.
And Ted Lasso nailed it in under five minutes with a dartboard and a smooth Midwestern drawl.
Final Thought: Don’t Be a Rupert
I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to be the guy who assumes he’s got it all figured out. I don’t want to be Rupert, laughing at people from across the room, convinced I’m better just because I said so.
I want to be the guy who asks questions, who listens, who finds out someone’s been playing darts every Sunday for six years before I challenge them to a game.
Because let’s be honest—Ted didn’t just win at darts that night. He won at life.
And if we’re paying attention, so can we.
